Whachoo lookin at?

Another train story....

Sooo Jamee J and I meet up in the city today...after prancing around for a bit and getting food we decide to head back to BK on the A train. As we're having a conversation about something random, I notice a lady smiling EXTRA hard at me. If you've ever been to NYC...watched a movie about NYC...or read any of our blog posts, you know how ODD an occurrence like this would be. So me being a semi-nice Midwesterner, I shoot her a quick smile back and continue with my conversation. After awhile we finally get 2 seats on the train directly in front of Ms. Happy pants. I notice she is STILL smiling at me! At this point I am starting to feel a certain way about it so I try to avoid eye contact and continue talking to Jamee. After awhile the lady actually stands up and walks over to me.

Her: "Excuse me. I"m sorry to bother you, but I think you're really pretty. Would you mind if I took a picture of you?"
Me: Ummmm *confused face*
Her: "Let me explain. I'm a writer and currently working on a book. You look exactly how I pictured the main character to be. I've been working with an artist to draw a picture of the main character...and have been looking online for models for reference, but haven't found what I have in mind. Do you happen to model or act?"
Me: "No."
Her: "Well you could."
Me: "Why thank you."
Her: "So would you mind if I took a picture of you?"
Me: "Sure."

She then fumbles with her iPhone and I fake a smile for the picture. She thanks me, I say no problem, and she sits back down. This whole time, Jamee is oddly trying NOT to look at this odd exchange...which was hilarious! But everyone in that section of the train was looking at me. It was so strange...yet funny.

Anywho, I guess I'll be the inspiration behind a character in some book one day. Or maybe my face will end up photoshopped to a naked body...who knows!! Oh well.

And that was your super random story for the day. LOL.

Clean up: Spilled baby hair gel on aisle 5

Ok...so on my last trip to Ohio...my dear friend Salina and I went on a late night trip to Walmart!


Ya'll know I didn't pack a lot of clothes this trip...a girl needs the necessities!


Blood pressure check! Dr. Oz said you gotta know your numbers!!

Yes...Salina is really riding a bike in Walmart

Weeeeeeeeeee!

In my former life, I had a white baby. Lol.

Remember the babies with the bad synthetic hair?!I used to always try to cut mine like Halle Berry!

Really?! They still make Baby Alive?!

A mile long aisle of "ethnic haircare"...oh Walmart! Walmart is so good as capitalizing on the needs of a specific market.

Please read the deets: "for EDGES, BABY HAIR, and sculpted Styles" BABY HAIR?!?Please note it doesn't say "Baby's hair"...they mean the process of ADULTS taking a toothbrush and brushing their "baby hair" down onto their foreheads!!! WTH?!? Lol.

Ooooh! I can buy HAIR in Walmart now?! Only $6.97!

The Return of the Summer Crazies....

Some of my favorite stories about NYC involve the train....

I was waiting alone for the A train at the Fulton stop
Him: "Hey do you know how to tie a tie?"
Me: "No"
Him: "Well you should realy know how to. What if I guy you really like doesn't know how to and needs you to do it"

I'm thinking...any guy I talk to would know how to tie a tie. Seriously. So this guy spends the next 5 minutes "teaching" me how to tie a tie. As he's teaching me, he saying a bunch of nonsense:

Him: "Yeah the tie is wrinkled bc I just stole it from Daffy's"
Me: "Why?" *confused face*
Him: "Because I have this event. Now doesn't this look nice? Now you'll be able to tie a tie for your man...you know...somebody cuter than me."
Me: *confused face*
Him: "So would I have a chance with you?"
Me: "Ummm...why are you asking me this?"
Him: "Just tell me"
Me: "Ummmmm....no probably not"

I swear this guy is gay, so I'm really confused as to why he's concerned about me. And he smells of beer and I really want him to go away at this point. So finally the train comes and we get on. I try my best to part from my new "friend". But he's following me! As he sees my trying to get away he starts yelling at me "WELL ITS YOUR LOSE! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!?"

I proceed to walk in the other direction to escape him...which is cool because 2 minutes later I see him trying the same game on another girl! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

I coulda sworn somebody was gonna pop out and say I was on a hidden camera show!


Another one...
Today while on the 4 train

Him: "You wanna sit down?"
Me: "No I'm about to get off, but thank you."
Him: "Ok. I like yo hair"
Me: "Thank you."
Him: "Yeah...I like yo hair...and I like yo face"
Me: "Ummmm...thank you"
Him: *mumble mumble mumble*
Me: *quick smile and turn of the face*
As I get off--Him: You have a nice day beautiful"

You like my face? LOL. Ok sir. And I don't even want to know what else you were mumbling. Smh. A compliment is nice...but some compliments are just a little scary.

Oh New York!

Now that its consistently summerish....

Hey guys! After a little hiatus...I'm back in NYC. Before I left, there was a bit of heat wave...and then the rain came outta nowhere!! Finally mother nature decided to stop being a moody chick and we've seen some consistent weather. So this reminded me of my list of things NOT to wear for a summer in NYC:

NO PANTS!
It gets soooo hot in NYC! All the people, no breeze, all the rushing...it just feel like 100 all the time to me! So pants are a no-no in my book.

NOTHING THAT REQUIRES A JACKET!
Sometimes I may where something that requires a jacket at work to make it a little more appropriate (spaghetti straps, tube top, etc)...but once I leave it has to come off bc its too hot! One time I made the mistake of wearing something that wasn't as cute w/o the jacket...big mistake! Never again! Especially now.

NO TIGHTS OR LEGGINGS!
I still see people wearing leggings. In my opinion...its just too hot. Stop it...you know you're super sweaty underneath those leggings!

NO CLEAR BRA STRAPS!
Ok...so you have shiny "invisible" straps on that look horrible. Maybe a strapless would do? Or maybe we should just change shirts? Either way I hate clear straps. Lol. Nice concept...horrible execution.

Here's a few things I MUST have during this time...

Sunglasses
No only do they protect your eyes from the sun...but also from the debris of NY streets! Oh! And they also increase the fly factor! Lol

Blotting sheets and bobby pins
I hate shiny face and unplanned crazy hair.

Ok. Yeah that was quick. But whatev! Ttyl lol

Summa Summa Summatime!

So last Saturday we went to Atlantic City! It was....uhhhh...hmmmm...an interesting trip! Lol. To be honest, it started off kinda hellishly (I love my made up word...sorry). But hey...it was something to do...and overall I had fun. Lol. Take a peek:

And we're off to AC!

The bus was freezing, so Jamee decided to build a wall of paper towels to "block" the air. And yes, she was convinced this would help *rolls eyes*


Within 10 minutes on the road J.Nicole and Aisha were knocked out! Don't you just love when your friends post not so cute pics online?! LOL. So here's a cute one! *Hey girls!*


The 1st hour in AC sucked...so we tried to escape to the outlets down the street...Jamee J tryna hitchhike!


But then suddenly we got the call that we (or Aisha and J. Nicole) were almost at the front of the line...so we starting sprinting back!



On the way back we saw a bunch of randomness


Line after line...after line. Lol.


Ching! Ching! Ching!


Big Ballin is my hobby!



I can quit my job...I won...$13.80


Look how much Jamee won....nothing...nada...zilch! Ha haaaaa!



"Gimme all yo money lady!"
"Oh no! Its a guuuuuunnnn!"


After a trip around the casino looking for food...J Nicole finally got mad and stole some chopsticks! Take that Asian Diner! Take that! Take that!


Patti the singing bartender



Cheers!


They definitely encourage you to drink in AC. Lol.



Hmmmm...I just wanna understand why there was a petition to get cats on the beach. *shrugs*



On the boardwalk

After a day in the casinos and hanging out on the boardwalk...we decided to hit the "other" side of AC...the backalley.



As I was about to climb the fence, a police officer on a bike caught me...if you squint you can see him in the background. I said to him "gasp! no! I was just kidding...I wasn't about to climb the fence! Hehe!" Look at the face of fear! Lol.


Drama Queen Jamee "Take me instead officer!"


So we thought it would be fun to take blurry pics of us jumping in the air and clapping our feet in the alley behind the casino....



More random feet clapping in the back alley...Aisha decided to join in the foolishness!



Signature Danielle hood pose



A little interpretive dance in the back alley? *shrugs* Don't ask!





Heading back to NYC...Now time for a little Rick Ross!



Our crazy non-puntual bus driver...sigh...oh Alan!

The End of my brief picture story...now fill in the blanks for the rest! Lol.

Malcolm X Blvd Survival Guide

If you haven't figured it out by now...we kinda...maybe...sorta...live in the hood...Bed Stuy to be exact. And I must say it has been an interesting experience to say the least. I like my street...I like my brownstone...but I HATE walking down Malcolm X Blvd! (Side note: Has anyone ever figured out why every street named Martin Luther King Blvd or Malcolm X Blvd is super hood?!? No matter what city in America you're in!! I guess we forgot that fact when apt searching). I digress. Let me explain why I hate walking down Malcolm X:

Too many dudes try to talk to you

You endure various catcalls

None of the guys are worth your attention

I guess it would be completely different if an attractive, stable man with a respectable job attempted to get your attention in a respectable manner...but that hasn't happen to me yet. Lol. Just to give you a little more insight into our world...here are a few typical interactions:

"Ay...lemme holla at you fo a minute" *Yes I used "fo" instead of for*

"Scuse me...scuse me...you gotta man? *Yes I used "scuse" instead of excuse*

"Oh you ain't got time to talk to me?!? Well f*** you too den...you ain't even dat cute!

"Ay...I like yo hair!" *I guess this isn't bad...but when they give you "the look" and do a little mouth motion...the compliment is completely lost. Lol.

My favorite is when the guys in cars ask you to come to the car to talk to them. No sir...what do I look like walking up to a man in a car?!? I'm in school for jewelry design...not prostitution! The "nicer" guys will speed up, park their cars, and start walking beside you pleading their case. My most hated involves anytime they try to touch me to get my attention...I don't care if its my arm or the shoulder of my jacket...DO NOT TOUCH ME!!

Keep in mind, I don't mind walking in the winter because hardly anyone is outside trying to bother me!! LOL. So let me give you my Spring/Summer rules for survival. (Note: these rules can be applied in Brooklyn, Harlem, and I guess Queens. I never go to Queens but try it *shrugs* OH...and for my Cleveland folk try it on St. Clair, Kinsman, and Buckeye...for my Dallas folk...try it in Oak Cliff! LOL)

You absolutely MUST have your earphones with you at all times! This makes you unapproachable. And believe me...you want to be unapproachable over here! Sometimes I have earphones in even when I'm not listening to anything. Then when you ignore them and they approach you anyway, you can say 'huh?!? huh?!? I can't hear you!" lol. *But this is most effective when your music is loud enough for them to hear*

My new favorite line is "nu uuuuuh! nu uh! I'm talking to my MOTHER!" 90% of the time they'll leave me alone if I say this! *Hey Ma!*

Huge "you can't see me" Sunglasses are great because you can act like you can't see them...and paired with the earphones you can't "hear" them. I LOVE to act like I'm invisible in the hood.

If they break through the barriers, you can listen for a bit and say "It was nice meeting you...I'll see you around". Surprisingly, this is usually received pretty well! Then if you see them again...give a little smile...not TOO inviting though!

You can say "I'm in a rush"...this tactic is hit or miss.

The "I have a boyfriend" line hasn't worked for me lately. The usual response is "You can't have friends?!? You ain't married!"

This brings me to a suggestion I haven't tried yet...wear a fake engagement ring. I seriously contemplated this...its a really bold tactic. And I've seriously tried on a few at my local cheap jewelry stores just in case I decide to go for it! But knowing these fools...that won't work. Lol.

I've also thought about this one but haven't tried...purposely make your face look ugly (momentarily of course). You could...make yourself look slow? You could mess up your makeup so you look super crazy? You can start to walk with a limp? You can start talking to yourself really loudly? Hmmm...Idk. This could probably be hit or miss. As you may have read from me or Jamee...even when you think you look absolutely horrid...someone will try to talk to you. Smh.

Also, any of these tactics can be used in conjunction with my favorite: Hoping on the B46 at Utica (or your local bus). This is probably pointless if you have to go less than 5 blocks. I have to go 8 blocks...so its def worth it for me! And today officially started my consistent bus riding season!

These are my go-to options for avoiding street harassment...they work completely sometimes and only partially sometimes. Lol. Smh. But most of all...its uber important to be nice to these guys...you def don't wanna get snatched up!! Remember...some of them don't mind going back in...LOL.

I couldn't end this post without talking about a few of the decent things in my immediate hood:

You can get fried chicken at any time of night! And its cheap! (Hello high blood pressure, diabetes, and whatever other disease that afflicts minorities most)

Our brownstone is nice! Right now Im sitting on the stoop...and I think this will be my new thing for the summer.

Ice cream trucks...I love how the hood always has ice cream trucks in the summer. Actually as I was writing this post sitting on my stoop, my next door neighborhood (who I have never met) asked me if I wanted something from the truck. Isn't that sweet?!?

There's a corner store on every corner...and a lot of them are open 24 hrs (via the tiny window). If you ever come home after the club and need a snack...you can just stop on your way home! There's a new corner store by the train station that has one of my fav juices!! (Simply Lemonade-Raspberry Lemonade)

Magic Soul Food: There's a cool little soul food spot down Malcolm X...like seriously good! I love to get the macaroni and cheese and the collard greens! Yum yum!

I'm sure I'll love even more as we get more into summer...from what I hear...Brooklyn is pretty aight in the summer. We shall see.

Staying thug-less in Bed Stuy,

Dani

Its the Little Things..

As I laid in bed last night tossing and turning with my small personal fan blowing lukewarm air on me, it suddenly hit…… I miss having ac!!! That fresh feeling of getting out of a warm shower and slipping into a nice cool, cold bed…. ahhhh the memories! Seeing as how the weather is still mild, (I'm STILL wearing freaking sweaters or light jackets) and I’m already yearning for ac I don’t know what I’m going to do when it gets Texas hot!  Please feel free to drop a note on this post with information in regards to donations cause I will definitely need to purchase a window unit.

On that note I started having flashbacks of all the things I missed….. yes at 12am… I even woke up to write them down so I wouldn’t forget.

1.       Air Conditioning units

2.       Pam my eye brow groomer (I've mentioned her before, but she will always and forever be near and dear to my heart. Yes, eye brows are that important. However, I’m learning to like Megha she’s my new lady at the threading place.

3.       Fast food chains such as: Chick-fil-a, Grandy’s, Steak n Shake, Sonic, Panda Express, Taco Bueno, Pei Wei and others. Honestly I miss all fast food chains….Call me crazy but, I don’t trust the fast food here, even from well known chains and the food just doesn’t quite taste the same. Many natives have told me that when they leave NY they are surprised at how much better the food at places such as Mcdonalds or Burger King tastes.

4.       Driving in a car

5.   Speeding

6.       Seeing the sky-the buildings are so tall that most times I don’t really get to see how nice of a day it is unless I make it a point to look up.

7.       Being able to wear heels at all times w/o having to worry about what bag can easily fit flats in them

8.       Grass

9.       Trees

10.    Heat

11.    Wal-Mart

12.  Going home and taking a nap on my lunch

13.  Quick Trip

14.  Leaving 10min before work instead of an hour

15.  The Rickey Smiley Morning Show

And of course I miss all you guys and gals family and friends . Well that’s all for now

~Toodles